Satan, the Dweller at the Threshold (involution-evolution)

Reading more about Dweller on the Threshold reframed my earlier doorway OBEs to have been a type of initiation to another degree of consciousness. I can see how, along a rather natural progression, the residual past me’s and even transpersonal -collective unconscious- the stuff of the World, formed a concentration of shadow consciousness. This was the entity next to the doorway. Or, like in the Wiki page, my confusion over these OBEs in the months that followed had to do with the cognitive dissonance of having experienced both vantage points, the ’solar angel’ and the ‘dweller’. Example: at the beginning I’m this bodiless, free being soaring around see-feeling in all directions. But then, I’m the one being pulled through a doorway, feeling myself being annihilated. Then pop I was back in my body. Several times this happened. Seemingly, I was going back to pick up these dwellers, until finally when I went to the meeting place there …

September 23rd, 2009

Things I Know For Sure

For those who may not be aware of the book, the title of this post is a nod to the Vonnegut book Sirens of Titan, wherein the main character, after being shoved around by the powers-that-be, has been brainwashed as a member of the Martian army. Though he starts off as a rather self-assured wealthy man in the beginning of the book, with the world at his fingertips, through a much more detailed chain of events than I have room to impart here (read the book!), he winds up as just another infantry soldier in the Martian army. He is repeatedly brainwashed as his natural proclivity for figuring things out arises again and again. During this time he makes a list entitled “Things I Know For Sure” which his brainwashed self repeatedly finds, learns from and makes additions to, thus this list helps him in clarifying his position within the state of things.

This notion of a list …

September 9th, 2009

Closed System?

aforest

aforest

February 2nd, 2009

Devils in My Details

nope, not a witty review of the Ohgr album (aren’t those great <sarcasm), but some stream thoughts of nebulae attached.

The first thing that comes to mind are the undercurrents of the culture in which I live that has boiling lesions like gang stalking, how the more unconscious covert methods of control are transmitted, received and likewise reinforced in daily interactions with strangers, loved ones and that fickle character, Friend.

I see the ways that I pass along the little notches in tone or emphasis, without really thinking about how it is that I picked them up because I subconsciously noticed how it got another person to notice and listen for a minute rather than straight off introject everything I say into their own mindscape.

I see the ways that purposely and covert methods of control, the malicious variety, like all evil, have a trickle down effect. This is evident in the shortened patience and peace of mind, so tested and tried …

December 23rd, 2008

Etc

now i forgot how the f this ties in to why i started writing [what i got started thinking about after a divination/space-time magick working].

can i count that as unretrieved shadow memories from other dimensional aspects of my life? hah! i suppose so. because all i know is where i came in on…so i see this change, this coming dawning of a new age in my life or something, but the wicked thing about it is that the challenge and payoff is all wrapped up in daily, mundanely lovely satisfaction, a warm bed and food to eat and hobbits to share it with. …i think. who knows maybe i won’t be able to stand working from home anymore or something, but some change is afoot and a lingering sadness/hopelessness keeps trying to drift in..over the last 2 days. all this indicating to me a greater coming round full circle type of intersection.

which got me to experimenting with embracing concepts, …

June 25th, 2008

Cinco de Meow

Today marks a year from the day we found Ogree the kitten on the side of the tollway. Narrowing to one lane, with more than 3/4 mile before an entrance/exit ramp in either direction, cars averaging 85 mph, we were driving along when my mother spotted the tiny, very gray, kitten. She was stretching up on her hind legs trying to sense her way up the concrete wall, as far away from the stream of cars as she could get.

With no where to go, and somehow steering clear of the cars racing by only a few feet from her, she was drawn to a metal grate in the shoulder of the tollway. This is where we wedged the car (to slow traffic) and I got out to scoop her up. With a hiss so mighty I hesitated about grabbing the tiny kitten, she was torn between distrust and need.

May 5th, 2008

more puppy, more puppy

SP in Houston last June 16, 2007 (Mythmaker tour) – some thoughts and pics – an ode to Skinny Puppy

January 8th, 2008